The Most Frustrating Advice

Has anyone ever told you that you just need to “get out of your own way”?

If so, you probably know how frustrating that advice feels. I know I did.

It used to make me want to scream because, of course, I already knew I was in my own way.

If I knew how to stop, I would have!

Anyways, I bring this up because I've had numerous conversations with people lately all centered around their self-sabotaging tendencies.

And I don't know...Maybe you've been there might relate.

Getting in your own way can look different for everyone.

For some, it can look like sabotaging a relationship you cared about.

Or, it might look like second-guessing yourself right before a big opportunity your worked and prepared for.

Or, my personal favorite, stalling your own momentum by creating a fire that needs to be put out just when things were starting to click.

It’s one of the most human experiences there is. And it can easily leave you wondering, “What’s wrong with me?”

Here’s the truth I wish someone had told me...Nothing is wrong with you.

Self-sabotage isn’t a character flaw, it’s a signal.

It’s your body’s way of saying you’ve reached your upper limit—the edge of how much love, success, or visibility feels safe to hold.

Think about it.

Every new level in life requires more vulnerability.

A deeper relationship requires you to let yourself be seen. A bigger opportunity at work requires you to risk being more visible.

Even financial growth asks you to trust yourself in new ways.

And when your nervous system doesn’t know how to feel safe with that much vulnerability, it pulls you back to the familiar.

That’s self-sabotage.

We convince ourselves that the next level of success will come from working harder or pushing more because that’s what got us this far.

But while effort matters, but it’s not the whole picture.

The deeper work is building an inner foundation that feels safe enough to experience what you’ve been chasing, so you can sustain it and actually enjoy it.

So if you’ve been stuck in the cycle of getting in your own way, maybe it’s not about fixing yourself or grinding harder.

Maybe it’s about learning how to expand your inner capacity to hold the very life you’re asking for.

Because the good you want isn’t just waiting for you to work harder—it’s waiting for you to feel safe enough to receive it.

If this resonates with you, and you'd like to talk more about it, let's find a time to connect. I'd be honored to hold space for you.

As always, I'm rooting for you.

We're in this together.

-Caleb

P.S. If you know someone who might resonate with it, feel free to pass it along!